The Power of Initiation

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Einzelne_KerzeI was sitting alone in a darkened room.

It was the Spring Equinox 1995.

Outside, somewhere in the house, I could hear movement. I’d chosen this. I kept reminding myself that I had chosen this. Born June 16th 1965 and my whole life had been leading to this moment. Soon I would be initiated as a Bard. I had heard stories of people losing their nerve and climbing out of a window, the room being empty when they were meant to be collected. I got that. I could see why someone might do that. But this was me declaring to the Universe that I was ready. That I would commit to a spiritual path and who knows where that might lead? Who knows what changes might occur because of this decision?

I heard movement in the room. I wasn’t alone after all. Ozzy the cat stared at me out of the darkness. A cat. That’s ok, I could deal with a cat.

The house had fallen silent. Nothing. No noise at all. Were they coming for me yet? Then I heard voices. I knew those words. The circle was being set. It would be soon.

I thought of my journey. Of buying my first occult book. Crowley’s Magick in Theory and Practice. Through my journey in Ceremonial Magic, to meeting Pagans, and then choosing my path. It had been quite a ride, but I knew that this would be nothing compared to what lay ahead. I was stepping onto the same path as Taliesin, Amergin, Myrddin. The path of the Sacred Poet. I felt both nervous and an overwhelming sense of magic.

I heard the Awen being chanted.

It was close. I looked at the window…

No. I was going to do this. It was right.

Footsteps outside. The door opened. The passage was dark, candlelit. I took the outstretched hand and was led out. Incense. Overpowering and beautiful. The smell of magic. The circle of white-robed figures stood before me. I was asked to crouch down.

“Are you ready”, I was asked.

“Yes”, I replied. “I am ready”.

8 responses to “The Power of Initiation”

  1. Mine was a Self-initiation, except that it wasn’t. I could feel the Ancestors of the land on which I live circle me as I spoke. They blessed me just as the sun rose. I was moved beyond description. The Old Ones and I have become good friends since then. They LISTEN 😀

  2. I can’t wait for mine…but I’m behind with reading my gwers. I hope to catch up with the pile of booklets soon in this darkness of my ‘cave’! Helps as it’s raining & cold outside up here in wildest Yorkshire. 🙂

  3. Fantastic account Damh! I am only just beginning the path and have my first set of Gwersi in front of me. I feel no trepidation, just excitement that the road my grandfather set me on many years ago is now coming to fruition. My cat is watching me after she sniffed all the booklets and seems to approve. Thank you for the music, being solitary makes it mean so much more when I listen to it. /|\

  4. What a beautiful personal account of your own initiation, it is a very nerve wracking moment isn’t it? But at the same time, so unlike any other first encounter with something new, there’s a kind of comfort in that nervousness. I don’t think I will ever forget my own initiation on the autumn equinox of 2009 with my Order at Portchester castle, it was a very special day and I’ll never forget it.

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